If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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