its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
