Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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