We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
