Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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