i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
