But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Randomize
