Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i drank out of a bidet.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
