she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
