i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
operation have a gay friend backfired
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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