I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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