Banned from zoo.
Again?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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