Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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