wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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