I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
