i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
