How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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