Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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