nut hugger
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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