Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
