I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
