I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I supernannyed him into submission
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