Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
