You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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