Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
