When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize