maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize