I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
