just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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