don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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