remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
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its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize