they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I'm always down for nudity.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
