So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
