I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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