I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
