And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
