Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...

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(256): View more from Alabama

Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(815): View more from Illinois

Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone

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(970): View more from Colorado

oh and then you called a time out with your penis

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(404): View more from Georgia

I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.

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(330): View more from Ohio

You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness

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(509): View more from Washington

I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?

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