Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize