her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
