mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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