I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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