Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
