I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
third nipple confirmed
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
