We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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