States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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