hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize