your room smells of hookers.
And success
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
