I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
