after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
