But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
