oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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