There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
