smell my finger.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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